The do’s and don’ts on handling a difficult colleague

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Loving one’s job usually doesn’t mean loving one’s co-workers. And when you have a colleague that is a bit difficult to deal with, it may just sour your experiences and productivity at work.

Whether or not you feel justified in finding your colleague difficult or unpleasant to deal with, it is still important to know that your success in the professional field hinges on your ability to work with others. If you let yourself be carried away by someone’s attitude, you’re more likely to risk throwing your and your team’s productivity off. 

Aside from this, it is not advisable to just completely avoid said colleague as you might miss out on work opportunities that could benefit you. Worse, you might even earn the reputation of being difficult.

While liking your co-worker is not a requirement in getting your tasks done successfully, it is necessary that one develops their strategy in working alongside difficult colleagues so as not to compromise the quality of the work. 

According to an article written at Kelly, here are some do’s and don’ts to think about when interacting with difficult co-workers:

1. Do examine your own behaviour first

Sometimes we end up disliking people simply because they remind us of those who have hurt us in the past or that they remind us of past situations that we are not comfortable with. 

If this is the case, you need to acknowledge that you are projecting your negative thoughts onto your colleague. Remind yourself that they are completely separate from the negative experience you’ve had in the past and view them from a forward-like perspective.

2. Don’t get personal with them

If they have done something against you or something that offends you, it is best that you do not stir the pot. Take the high road in the situation and prevent yourself from bringing the issues into your workplace.

Try and shift your focus away from the person and onto something more productive. This will not only help you stay productive at work, but it will also prevent any problems from arising should you make it personal.

3. Don’t let them bait you into unprofessional behaviour

Arguments, unhealthy rivalries, gossiping, and other unprofessional behaviours are sure-fire ways to destroy a workplace. Not only do these acts have the potential of harming one’s career, but they can also negatively affect one’s image in the professional world.

If your co-worker is acting unprofessionally, you should never take part or join them in their behaviour. Set boundaries around them to not only protect yourself but to also keep your focus on getting your work tasks done.

4. Do communicate the issues you are having with them

If taking the high road is not an option, you might as well talk to them about their behaviour. Discussing with them your issues can not only help you air out your grievances, but it will also help both of you find a solution that satisfies both parties.

To do this successfully, you must phrase your thoughts carefully in order to avoid sounding accusatory or hurtful. Being too blunt and aggressive with your words can lead your colleague to defend themselves, causing even more communication barriers. Unless you are careful with your words, you will not be able to resolve the issues between you two.

5. Do remember what you gain by working alongside them

Sometimes you have no choice but to work with a colleague you have difficulty getting along with. As such, it is best that you do not focus your thoughts on your negative feelings for the individual, but rather on what you can learn from them or how you can leverage your collaboration for your own professional benefit.

6. Don’t be afraid to ask for assistance

There are some cases where you cannot resolve the situation with your co-worker on your own. When that happens, then it is time for you to ask your manager to step in and help diffuse the tension. However, it is best to approach your supervisor after you have exhausted all other options at reconciliation with your co-worker.

The do’s and don’ts on handling a difficult colleague 

While working with a difficult colleague is never fun, it is important for you to remember that, for your own career and reputation, you should never let interpersonal problems with co-workers get in the way of your own professionalism.